What The Funk and Other Random Thoughts

I'm super addicted to a game I've been playing all about music, it's super fun and reminds me of name that tune for the modern era.

Last night went well with all scheduled people showing up with proper documentation was even better. I love my job. I was super annoyed yesterday but it wasn't due to anything in particular just how I was feeling. I really think I handled it well way better than I used to.

I so wish we weren't so poor and idiots for spending our money on useless shit, but such is life right?

Our biggest loser competition is coming to a close and I feel real good about the results and super excited for what's to come afterwards. I pretty much reached my goal way ahead of schedule which brings me to making a new one for the same time period. I would like to be out of the 200's all together by the time my birthday in July comes. I'm tired of not being healthy weight wise.

My goal for work is to be transferred to the lodge slated to be built in California, but I still have a lot to learn before that happens, and thanks to Diva, she's been my teacher for sure. She swears that my talent is in the finance department, and although I agree with her on that, I can't get over the fact that I love what I'm doing now. It fits me more to be the people person that everyone knows and to actually be more knowledgeable to answer their questions better would be awesome.

You know the saying "You don't miss it until it's gone". Well I've been feeling this way for sometime now, but I'm not quite sure on what it is I miss truly. Is it payroll.....hahaha kind of, but not really. My grandpa or my dad, absolutely everyday!! Is it my youth and childhood friends, of course but we have to grow up sooner or later. I'm sure the feeling will subside and boil over like all the other feelings I have. I am human after all.

In 3 weeks the bear's brother is heading to Disneyland, and we couldn't be more jealous. Everyday is torture for both of us, with a lot of events triggering memories of our past trips and making us want to do like yesterday. Since I have a lot of vacation time now it's really hard to just sit here and not do anything. So sad but true.

Yesterday marked my 5th anniversary with the lodge. I truly love what I do with a few minor glitches but I guess that goes with any place. In my experience, everything has it's ups and downs and nothing lasts forever. I'm just afraid what's to come, and the fact of the unknown scares the shit out of me, but it too will pass. Well there you have it random thoughts by a very random person.

Anger Issues

We all have our gripes and complaints, and it's human nature to express them. Normally I can go day to day and hear such complaints and concerns without batting an eye lash, but yesterday just seemed to make me twinge at every turn. I don't know what the hell it was that made my ears listen in on all the negative comments and conversations, but it was like a magnet for them. I stayed in my office and just drowned myself into application after application to where I didn't have to socialize with anyone. I'm a social butterfly as everyone would probably describe me, and I flutter around sparking up conversation where ever I go, but yesterday just seemed to cocoon this guy. On a happier note, I did end up finding a picture of myself for my before picture and OMG I was fat!! I am standing next to my mom before the football game and all I can say is NO MORE BUFFET. With this weight loss success, I'm proud to say as of yesterday I'm down 23 lbs for the competition at work (which only has one more week from yesterday) and down 35 lbs from when I started my diet or I should say life style change because diets fail and people will gain back the weight. Not this clown, I'm so not going through that shit again. I feel better about myself and my whole out look on life isn't so miserable any longer. Now if only I could spread the cheer around again the people mentioned above wouldn't be so angry, but I'm not God and don't have the power to control people, or do I <EVIL LAUGH>

They Can't All Be Great

This weekend was so very low key. We decided to do a little gambling on Saturday night, which meant all plans for Sunday were out the window since we didn't get home and in bed until 4am. I got woken up by a whiny dog at 10 which meant I was in zombie mode all day. Oh the joys of having spoiled dogs. We watched the Oscars last night which wasn't anything that spectacular, just something to do since nothing else was on. Since I haven't seen any of the movies that were up for anything I wasn't really cheering for anybody in particular but was very happy about Anne Hathaway, because she is amazing in my eyes and can play almost anything she wants to. So here's to another week of fun and more fun at work, and to watching a movie with spud after work, maybe.

I'm Sure I Put It Somewhere

So a moment of loss because of extreme exhaustion last night had me misplace my intelligence and instead you got a crazy mother fucker running around laughing at nothing. Granted, I'm normally insane in my own right but I have stages of tired that most people don't know about. They may have some of the similar stages but most people stop at the first one, stubbornness. The other stages for me, is yawning, laughing at completely everything, cranky, fluxes of high and very low energy. This is just to name a few. It's the moment when my brain goes haywire and shuts down to energy saving mode. Gotta love it. Hell if it isn't Friday today, gotta love that right.

What You Don't Know

I saw on facebook the other day a post that someone put on their status that just made so much sense. It said "Ignorance is bliss, no it's simply ignorance is ignorance". These words are so true and so many people actually believe it. Whatever happened to knowledge is power? Did we lose our way in the war against stupidity? Or did we simply give up teaching people that incompetence is not okay and also really annoying? I get that the less we know the less trouble but that's no excuse or an explanation on why people do the stupid, idiotic things that they do. Here's an example: A man kills another man and when asked why he did it, he replies "I didn't know any better". BULLSHIT, and how lame is that excuse. But it falls in the realm of ignorance is bliss. In other words they didn't know that murder was bad. Okay maybe that is a little extreme, but it's truth. So the one saying that rings loud and clear is "What you don't know will kill you". Think about it.

Followed by Spirits

Sunday, we watched Paranormal Activity 4. It wasn't a bad movie, it wasn't great either. Just like the previous 3, it starts out boring as fuck, but finishes up okay. Unlike the first two, this one made no sense and had more product placement then the latter. In other words, it shouldn't have been made. Monday was a normal busy day of playing catch up. Nerves were all over the place with having corporate wondering around. But I paid no mind since there wasn't anything big happening, plus we had an update to one of our systems which found me updating all of our opened positions so that they finally load properly to our location. My partner in crime and I worked on payroll to make sure it was done on time, although she really didn't need my help all that much we did stop a tragedy from happening. She sounds like me when I was doing payroll getting all pissed off at the same shit I did. Diva had Friday and Monday off, so I tried to help her with some stuff, but alas it was futile since I wasn't sure what I was doing. And so instead of making things worse I figured I'd let it wait for the genius to return. All in all it was a good busy day.

On the work out front, I've taken the reigns and wouldn't let my team mate slack even though she was tired and sore. After massaging her neck I could tell she had slept wrong and it caused a knot in her shoulder blade, so we took it a little easier than normal on the walk at work. Diva won the prestigious "Biggest Loser of the Week" on Friday which makes me so damn proud of her. I'm still in first, followed by Diva and then our team mate. Sunday found me walking almost 5 miles not counting what I did with the dogs around the field, which made me happy. Everyday I'm finding myself thinking of new places and further distances to walk to. With no goal in sight just time against me especially on work days, I'm just walking to see how many calories I can burn and so far I'm burning more than I'm taking in. I'm not entirely sure if that is a good thing but it's working. Besides the normal work out I do in the morning the walking is doing me a world of good and the progress is showing because I'm fitting in my old Levi's again. I keep telling myself that I'm not going back to what I was, and I pray that I keep that promise. Also, this should keep the doc off of my back about my weight. I just can't get lazy and with the support I have now, I don't see that happening. Although after the competition is over I'm so eating a burger!! Then it's back to salads for me.

Thinking About You

I dream at night thanking you for being here
I wake and realizes you are not
A symbol of my grief is with this tear
Wanting you to not be gone because I miss you a lot

As the days go by and I get older
The memories start to fade
Deep in my heart is where I hold you
It's because of you are the choices I've made

To find happiness again seems lost
But you wouldn't want me to think that way
You'd want me to carry on no matter the cost
I can still hear those words you would say

You are my son, grandson and friend
Go out and make the world yours
I will always be with you until the end
Live your life and let your wings soar

Don't ever let them get you down
And if you should fall know it's not the final blow
Get back up before you drown
You have much more inside so let it show

Thinking about you makes me smile
Knowing what you taught me makes me stronger
Wishing you were here for a little while
The fact that you love me keeps me going longer

Best Monday EVER!!

I don't think I've ever muttered those words before, but it was actually one of the best days I've had in a long time. Our biggest loser competition is heating up with only 3 weeks left, I was the biggest loser 2 weeks in a row. I also took first place followed by Diva, who will probably get it back at the next weigh in, but it feels good to be on top right now. I hopped on the scale yesterday morning to find that I'm no longer in the 240's but 238. I had suggested we go for our walk at 11:30 yesterday and to do all eight floors twice, but as we made it to the eighth floor, Diva looked at her watch and said we don't have time to do it a second time. So we made our way back down and as we reached the break room there were a whole bunch of people standing around and Diva said let's go see what's going on in there, as she pushed me into the room. We stood around looking bewildered at one another and I knew it was big because our GM was there. My boss man finally showed followed by someone from F&B wheeling in a huge cake. From where I stood it looked like it said "baby" on the cake and I was excited that we were celebrating our admin assistant's new bundle of joy, but as the cake got closer it had my name on it and my boss man announced that I was the employee of the month for January. I got beet red as everyone clapped and was congratulating me. I'm not used to having that much attention on me, but don't get me wrong it felt wonderful. The rest of the day just seemed to fly by as I sat in my office with a swollen head and a permanent smile on my face. I'm so thankful to everyone who voted for me especially my partner in crime for the nomination. She is the best!!

What a Weekend

Friday was awesome, but you already read about that. Saturday was a complete blur. Mostly stayed home and watched our shows and went to bed at 6pm, only to wake up at 8am on Sunday. Sunday was my sister's birthday to which I wasn't able to join her due to finances being so low. But I wished her a good one regardless. She understood and still managed to have a great time. We went shopping for groceries and all that important grown up stuff, and then settled in to watch our Sunday stuff. All in all it was a great weekend.

A Night To Remember

Friday was a normal work day, well sort of. We were all antsy to get our butts out of the office and into the bars. Diva and my partner in crime decided to call it quits early because we couldn't stand it any longer. We first went to my partner in crime's house to change. Since I'm a guy, it didn't take long for me to change so while waiting for my ladies to spruce up, I hung out with my partner in crime's son who showed me his hobby which is building, painting bicycles. That kid has some real talent. I was the DD last night and we took the partner in crime's 300 out on the town. First stop was the casino. We gambled and the ladies drank very strong whiskey and diet cokes, of course I had to have a sip and OMG. A coworker and his wife met up with us while Diva and I ate some delicious food from the Sidewalk Deli. Then we got an invite to meet up with another coworker who happened to be at a local bar in Rochester. So we decided to head out to this redneck bar. It was fun and boy was it entertaining to watch the drunk drama unfold. We played some pool and listened to the music. I decided that since they were having Karaoke, that I would go and sing some Alan Jackson. Good times and sober singing is the best!! After a few more hours, Diva was ready to go and we headed back to the partner in crime's house to end the evening. What a night of harmless flirting, more crack than you'd want to see, and good friends hanging out and letting go.

Here Comes The Weekend

In the spirit of being single, the Diva and my partner in crime are going out on the town tonight with me being the DD. I'm so excited to go and spend some time with my bestest friends tonight. Plus, this morning is our fifth weigh in and my fingers are crossed for more loss. Only the scale will know lmao. Saturday is a huge day of GROCERY SHOPPING YAY!!! Then Sunday me and the bear are headed to Auburn to celebrate my sisters birthday. It's going to be a great weekend.

Things I Wish I Didn't Lose

It's been a few years now since I've actually picked up a pen and paper to write. It was my passion so long ago to become something of an author. It all started with a fun group I created with my cousins that just expanded to something more. I was about 8 or 9 when we created "The Mystery Kids" and would create our own stories. Yeah we copied a lot from Scooby Doo, but as kids we didn't know any better. When I was in second grade, I would write our adventures down and actually found our main antagonist from reading the name off a toilet seat that was made of old newspaper headlines. As I got older, so did the stories and my Aunt Cindy told me that we are growing up and should be known as "The Mystery Teens". I thought it was a great idea and the only big story I wrote ended up with my cousin who was in love with the stories. I think it was a 150 page story by the time I was finished with it and granted it wasn't the greatest read in the world but it was my own creation. My cousin thought it was amazing so he got the only copy, where it is now I have no idea. But my passion grew from that to writing somewhat more "soap opera" like stories and I so wanted to be a writer on "Days of our Lives". My first attempt was a story called "The Lonestar Cafe" loosely based on the Beach Pit off of the original 90210. All the characters were people I knew at the time and the stories were based off of actual events but twisted for more story. I had the character backgrounds, the plot lines for each chapter, and even pictured it playing on TV. Alas, I hit 19 and the story to this day has never been finished. I knew how I wanted the story to go, but never could finish it. I dabbled in poetry a little, but it was more my thoughts written down on paper which I guess is what poetry really is. The bear is always giving me shit because they didn't always rhyme, and I thought to myself "I'm not fucking Dr. Suess." I would write a title and follow it up with words the reflected the title. I also wrote short stories mainly about things that just popped in my head. To this day, I wish I could go back and just write, but life got in the way and permanent writer's block hit, more like the passion was gone. I suppose it is apart of growing up and leaving dreams behind. I still have my poetry, short stories, and the unfinished novel that I look back on and read from time to time just to see if I can spark the interest again. Maybe someday.

Week in Review

This week was a very strange week. With everyone getting sick the days just flew by. Since I was out on Monday, coming in Tuesday saddened by the thought of getting Diva sick and found out one of our other teammates were out as well. Diva ended up leaving early and then calling in the following day which happened to be her birthday as well. What a gift to give a great person on her birthday......a freaking cold!! Wednesday was odd, still feeling the cold I decided to get my work out in anyway not letting the sickness get me down. However, I should have taken it a little easier since I took the stairs and thought I was going to die when I got to the 5th floor. What the hell, and then it dawned on me "YOU AREN'T BETTER YET DUMBASS!!" Yesterday was better, Diva and Lovemuffin were back in the office, but we decided to let our bodies heal and decided not to walk. There were a couple of firings and a few lay offs but all in all it was a very productive day for this cubby. Today is FRIDAY!! and it's our weigh in. I feel like I'm going to kill this one.

On the homefront, we are worried about this next payday. Since I lost so much time at work, I'm scared for my money situation, then I decided this morning to re-evaluate the bill situation and found away to alleviate our money woes. So all is good in that department, plus to my surprise this morning we've received our refund check so mom and dad can be paid off in full and on to the next huge debt our sectional. Then our credit cards. By the end of this we should be sitting pretty for our relocation to Cali. Being a responsible adult is stressful and hard, but not unachievable.  HAPPY FRIDAY BITCHES!!