Interview & Training

So my interview went well I believe. I don't think I have anything to worry about in that department. Since I'm training my boss on payroll, I didn't really have much to do yesterday so we set up a second interview with Diva for later that day. That was changed due to her getting rushed to the ER (no pun and a little over dramatic). Me being concerned and not knowing why she and spaz left, I texted her and she was the one who told me what happened. I'm just glad that she is ok and was able to go home and rest and hopefully I'll be able to see her today, if not then I hope she is recuperating at home. So today I concentrate on getting payroll drilled into the head of my boss and deal with the backlash of her so-called evaluation that she had asked everyone to do of her. Those who know me know that I'm not shy in letting people know how I feel about them, but I don't stir the pot if I don't need to and since I was asked, I'm not going to lie and sugar coat anything. Plus, this is the first time that I've had to train anyone on the backside of payroll. Printing the reports is one thing but getting them to know what to do with them and what they mean is whole other story. Getting her to be apart of the payroll process is long over due in my eyes and maybe she'll have some input on doing the job differently. Rather it is right or wrong, she is the boss and what she says goes right? BS!!! That means BULL SHIT!!! I didn't spend all those countless hours fixing a somewhat broken process just for some wanna be know it all to swoop in and fuck it all up again. I've established a detailed methodical way of doing things to keep the process as streamline as possible and to alleviate any mistakes. If there are mistakes then they are easy to find. Hopefully she catches on like she says she can and it translates well to the next person who fills that role, but I'm getting ahead of myself really. Nothing has been announced yet and who knows if I'm really getting the other position yet. Until it's announced it's business as usual and the boss is getting the much needed training she should have had ALONG TIME AGO!!  

5/30/12

So I have my interview today for the ER (HR) position. I've finally realized that I have to stop living my life through how others feel. For the longest time, I spent too much time worrying about what a friend might feel if I did this, or am I going to disappoint someone if I do that. I've been told on multiple occasions that if it makes you happy and it's what you really want to do, then do it and shut up about it. So here I go venturing out onto something new, because I'm tired of feeling stuck and the fucked up part is I didn't even realize that was how I was feeling until dumb ass pointed it out about my predecessor and how she felt in the same position. I do like my job and what I do, but it's time for a change and since I'm getting no where with my current peeps  I must move on. Hell maybe I'll stick around a while longer and see how this plays out. April 2013 is a long ways away yet.

5/25/12

It was a great Friday, work went by very well since I was medicated and feeling a lot better today. In hopes that something would be said about the position opening alas nothing was talked about and no interview as of yet. I'm not worried about anything however. I will continue to be patient. Training payroll was a little frustrating when attention span of the trainee is very limited and since they need to butt in on all that goes on in our office makes it ten times more difficult to keep her focus on the job at hand. I really would love to get them trained so I can have a back up in case I am sick, I get this new job, or I do move. The sad thing is they should have already known the job. Oh well, better late than never. When I got home, I couldn't relax at first with all the company. As they slowly went on their way, I started to come down from the sudafed and went to bed at 8:15pm. It was a great Friday, and looks like it's going to be a better weekend with me and the bear and his brother's dog lol.

So Yeah, I Did It

As mentioned in yesterday's blog about the position that was opening, I applied. After careful deliberation with myself, I decided that it would be in my best interest to go for it. I pushed fear away and talked with my current boss and told him that I was going to apply, and after it was posted I told him that I applied. Change is a scary and unforeseen event, but for this cubby, it's very much needed as said before. Why do you think I've been pushing so hard to get someone on the reigns of learning payroll? I'm praying and hoping that I get it, I know I can do great things with it. Hell, look what I've done with payroll. It's now a well oiled machine along with AR which is squeaky clean now. PLEASE!!!!!!!!!! Let me get this new position.

Something To Think About

I've been thinking and thinking about change and how desperately I need it. Ever since I was told about a possible switch to another department, it's all I've been thinking about. Then yesterday I was told that a friend got a position that has newly opened up. Which means the one that I've thought about is available. I've been talking about wanting to and now it seems that I may be doing so. As soon as it opens up I'm applying, but this is going to cause some negativity from my current place in the food chain. The thing is, I've been worried about that for far too long and now it seems to me that I have a chance to get away from it all. What does a boy do? I'm still planning on moving down to California, but that is still a long ways away, and I know that I could do great things in this newer position. I can utilize my people skills as well as my thirst for knowledge. I'm keeping my fingers crossed!!

5/21/12

Another weekend down. We spent our entire weekend entertaining a bored brother in law. The bear's brother and his niece came over to see virtual Disneyland. The game is pretty cool, you control a kid avatar and walk around the park to do odds and ends for the characters you run across. The game is called Kinect Disneyland Adventure. The person who made the game really loves Disneyland, because they left no stone unturned. With a few forgivable glitches, it's like experiencing the park minus the crowds. The mini games however are lack luster and the controls are very clunky and sometimes non-responsive. They should have let you ride the rides instead of mini games and left the game play to the errand running. All and all, for those who love Disneyland will enjoy this game, those who have never been will probably stay clear of this one. It impressed the brother in law that he actually bought the game and surprised his daughter with it before they left last night. I just wish I had time to play it more, lol.

Almost There

To realize a dream takes sacrifice and determination. I've done all the figures in my head and granted they hypothetical, I believe that I can make them a reality. Good news it won't take me that long, bad news is we may be seeing another Washington winter. I've ran everything backwards and forwards to ensure that we don't fuck ourselves and they seem do able. I'm pretty stoked at this point. I'm so ready for our next big adventure but I can't look to far into the future just yet.

I'm Going To Be A Great Uncle

I found out yesterday morning that my niece is pregnant at 18. Not saying it's a bad thing and not saying I didn't see it coming. If she is happy then I'm happy for her. My sister is handling it well, and my mom is encouraging the whole thing which is twisted to me but whatever. I love my family.

5/15/12

Yesterday wasn't a very good day. My partner in crime is having issues at home. I was in shock and awe when she told me about their blow up. I am here for her regardless and I made that clear to her. As for me, I'm running out of steam and I think it's due to needing a vacation even if it is short. I talked about taking a 4 day weekend in June, then the bear made a crack about me wasting my days even though he was kidding I asked what else am I using them for. You say save them up for those just in case moments, well welcome to my just in case I FUCKING snap moment. We'll see what happens. In the meantime, I'm just breathing and hoping that I'm strong enough for my partner to lean on.

It's All About Control

We all need it and we all like to think we have it. Our lives are what we make of them and no one can change them but us. We can only blame our problems on the past for so long before even that gets really old. If you sit there and do nothing then nothing is what your going to get and you just gave up control. As this may be fine for some people, it's not for me.

I Don't Feel Like It

Lately I've been scratching at the seams wanting to just bust loose and leave this all behind me. I don't know what the hell is taking so long or what is keeping me tethered to those remaining stitches, but something has got to give before I make a huge mistake. I'm conflicted all the time and not really knowing what my next move should be to end up toward my final goal of this whole dream. I have a few ideas and some people aren't going to like them. 

5/9/12

A side effect from my new drug is more dreams, well they have become realistic. Last night, I dreamed that I was living in Toledo again but the house was a little different which should have been a clue that it was dream. I had taken a few hits of our roommates marijuana pipe and the high feeling was so real. In my dream I went to sleep and woke up hoping that me taking a hit was just a dream from my medication then panic struck me realizing that it wasn't a dream. Then the alarm went off to break me out of the whole world and I was relieved that it was in fact just a dream. This is just one of many dreams that I've had since being on the drug. I've always had bizarre dreams that seemed real since I was young, but they are becoming more real playing on memories from my past. I suppose it's just something I have to deal with, it could be worse because the other side effect is diarrhea lol.

I Miss You

If the dream I had last symbolizes anything it indicates that I miss a friend who I haven't seen or heard from in months. It was so real, but for me they all usually are. I heard that he's been going through some stuff lately that is life changing, and I hope to God he lands on his feet. This man has been through so much and he is a great man.

The Evolution

As we evolve into those responsible people our parents had envisioned us to be (some of us anyway), do you ever look at those around you and wonder what went wrong. This weekend has shown  me such people. Then again it was Walmart and every one goes there. It's like a bad experiment gone horribly wrong. You knew it wasn't going to be pretty when you started but nothing prepared you for the results. It's nothing that hasn't been said before and sad to say it will never change. However, this is something I won't have to worry about. I've said it before, "If it wasn't for these people, we'd have to exploit our own faults." So thank you for that. I judge knowing that I'm being judged and I'm okay with that. It's human nature, as it is to dread Mondays, and yet here we are again.

5/4/12

Finally, I'm making some head way and making a huge dent in this financial situation. We are a few steps closer to realizing our dream of leaving Washington. I am making sure that we are on the right track and who knows, maybe we will get down there to California by the end of the year as I want. The huge challenge now is making sure we stay this way. With all the temptation of those damn twinkly lights of the slot machines in our heads, it's going to be tough. I've said no no no plenty of times to get it through our heads that we don't have the luxury anymore to be wasteful. We've come a long way and still have miles to go.

When It's Over

Now that my life has calmed down and I'm getting ready for that next big step, I've been doing my friend duty and listening (not helping or giving advice, just listening) to my friends tell me their woes. They only need an ear to vent or a shoulder to lean on. I'm pretty sure they are getting plenty advice thrown at them already. One case in particular is with my partner in crime. She only needs me to listen, especially if the issue is about her kids. Since I don't have kids (and never will) I really couldn't give her any advice if I wanted to anyway. Then there is a.d.d. boy, his issue is so different because it deals with real emotion and desires. His situation is one that I have given advice about because I've been in his shoes to a point (I only tried them on but never walked around in them). The song from Sugar Ray plays through my head as his theme when I see him, and yesterday he said the same thing which isn't unusual for we have the same way of thinking most of the time. I may not be able to help them with their situations but I can listen. That is why god gave us ears and even though most people don't want to hear, there are still some of us out there that want to listen and give that person a chance to vent no matter how small or big the problem is. I love all my friends and I always will.

I'm Not Going To Lie.....

.......this may sting a little. So much for the peace and quiet of the office. I'm prepared though. I just realized that my problems are not as big. I don't really have that much to complain about. Annoyances can be easily avoided by ignoring them. Plain and simple right, but you can only ignore a mosquito for so long before you swat at it.