Day Off As If

It was a very busy day today getting the crack apartment cleaned and ready for our walk through. We started at 11:30am and got done at 5:30pm. That place is cleaner than I've seen it besides when we first moved in. We will be getting some money back, but the walk through was never done due to the office being closed at 4 for a meeting. I call BULL SHIT, but whatever. That was the last time I have to go to that apartment and I couldn't be happier. However, since the parents still live there we will have to visit especially since we owe $1200 for our car repair, lol a small price to pay to see the happy couple. Back to work tomorrow.

The Move

SUCCESS!!!! We were able to get everything moved in 4 hours. I feel very accomplished, and after it was all said and done I was pooped. None the less, it is over and I'm sore this morning for sure, but so worth it. Thanks to the bear's brother and family for helping. Now it's the fun part of moving, finding a place for everything. Granted, I already have some ideas where things should go and I already unpacked a few things, but we still have lots of boxes to go. Back to work today.

Tests

I believe that everything that happens in life is a test of all our strengths and weaknesses. I'm no different, just 3 days before our move, our car decides to go down for the count leaking profusely. If it weren't for our mom and dad we would be screwed, so a huge thanks goes out to them. We took the car to be looked at and the cause of our problem is a cracked something something, I'm mechanically retarded when it comes this stuff. The final cost with parts, labor, and whatever else is $1200.00. On top of that, since every penny counts now, I can't miss work so we decided to rent a car for a few days to help. Plus, we need a car for the move so it just made sense. Thanks to the bear for coming up with that one and for the brother for helping us out with this. The bear expects me to be the level headed one all the time, and sure I can oblige most the time, but this has totally freaked me out. Granted I'm way better now and all I have to do is some juggling with finances, but I want to be moved before I even attempt to figure this out. I'm not stressed like he is and nor will I be. I am an optimist when it comes to these sort of things. But after hearing him go off yesterday has done a number on me which freaked him out more. I ask him what I can say to make it better, of course there is nothing that can make it better except for getting everything paid off. But that takes time and we have nothing but time right now. I could tell him not to stress or freak out but that won't work, it never does. All I can do is tell him that it will be alright and that I will juggle the finances around to make this work. It's hard to be human and the level headed one all the time. I do need my time to freak the fuck out so I can get it all out of my system and go back to being the optimist that makes me ME.

Revelation

As we count the day (3 to be exact) before our move, it's clear to me that this has to happen. Since the bear has expressed his dislike for the place we are in now, I've been witness to the most white trash living since I lived in the trailer park in Hermiston, Or. So many crazy people surround us as neighbors and when we first moved here I was blinded by it all. Since I work all day, I'm not around to see first hand how crazy and trashy these people really are. I understand the whole concept of being poor and living on welfare and needing living assistance. But do you really have to live like you are on it? I mean, poorly behaved children running a muck around the complex. People up at all hours of the day talking about their parole hearings, child support payments, and god knows what else. It's really sickening to me that not only did we subject ourselves to this place, but we are associated with it all for just living here. Again, I was blind to it all until this last summer when the bear pointed out a few things and my eyes opened widely to everything around us. From the scum living a building across from us, to the crazy dog walking lady that talks to herself. The saying "we all have to live somewhere" has never been so true. Since we didn't have the luxury of searching, we took what we knew, and even getting in here was a pain in the ass. That right there should have sent up red flags that we deserved better. However, now that the days are closing on this chapter in our lives, I can look back with no regrets just the happy thoughts knowing that we do deserve better and now we can say we have better.

It's Getting Better

As I continue with my growth, it seems to me that everything is getting better and better with every passing day. I'm getting the crowd roaring with laughter and getting them to open up and ask questions regarding what it is I'm showing them on the screen. I am a ham when it comes to things and I'm not near as nervous as I was when I first took over the class. I really do love what I do now. In other news, our move grows closer and closer (4 days to be exact) and we are back to square one when it comes to changing the address. We were insured by our new place that we don't need to include a box number to our address just the apartment number so now we have to change everything that we changed already. Luckily as I went through the ones I've changed it's just been the apartment number. Who knew it was going to be this frustrating, however the only frustrating part is how much more we are making of it. Especially when one of us is a huge worry wart. Love him as I do, he get overly worked up over nothing. The closer we get to this move the more he goes crazy.

Clean and Pack

Counting down the days for it's almost here. Pack this and pack that, wipe this down dust that off. I never realized how dusty an apartment can get until you are moving something that hasn't been touched in 4 years. Shredded useless documents from years past, and threw away stupid random pieces of paper and manuals on things that we don't have any more. Why the hell do we keep this shit for?

And Now For The Show

What a busy week it has been. Nothing too stressful but very busy for all parties involved. I'm so glad that it's the weekend that I can shake off the burdens of the work week and relax. Even though it's going to be a busy weekend, only one major thing that needs to be done and that is to sign our lease. Then after that it's only 8 short days before moving day. I just can't wait until we are moved in and able to enjoy our new digs. Yes I said digs lmao. When I came home last night (and I use that term loosely) our neighbor was standing outside putting on a show for the whole complex to see, and I was so close to getting back into the car and driving around the block a few more times just so I didn't have to see the shit. I also think to myself poor bear having to put up with this shit on a daily basis. But then it dawned on me that we only have a few short days left of this fucking hell hole. People piss me off.

Yet Again

We've all had our funks and it takes it's toll on us all. The Diva was the latest victim in this epidemic. It's an unexplainable event that just takes over us and puts us into this mood that we can't shake. It just goes away, but for some people it hangs around for awhile. Mine lasted a fucking week and nothing helped. Although I'm better, the effect of it has tarnished others. I'm not saying that I'm to blame for others moods, I know that others effect me when they do nothing but be negative all the time. It's really a combination of things that set it off. I suppose having a some kind of release would have done the trick, like a night of drinking, or the one thing that I can't touch anymore. If we were in Cali, our release would be walking the park to soak in the happiness that fills us each time we go. Maybe a healthy walk around the block with the dogs and good music in my ears. It sure helped yesterday, and to be getting back into my exercise routine has made me a better person for sure.

As The Old Saying Goes

As the storms rolled in, the weekend rolled on. It was another relaxing weekend with not much to do about nothing. We just sat here dreaming and talking about what it would be like down in Cali and how we are excited that we will be in our new place soon. How nice will be not having to deal with all the crack heads that are here in this ghetto. We watched movies and just stayed cozy inside. The one movie that surprised me the most was called "The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel for the Elderly & Beautiful". It starred all British actors one being Maggie Smith and the other Judi Dench. It was a nice sweet funny movie. Sunday I watched most of the Seahawks game to the dismay of the bear. "I can't wait to have two tvs" I heard him mutter. He kept himself busy doing his house chores. Coming out of the casino from getting our freebies we over heard two guys talking about the game and the bear just cringed. We get into the car and he just goes off about how he just doesn't understand sports fans. I think it's funny because he can't escape it. It also turns out I missed the best part of the game due to our running around. Oh well, he'll get over it until next weekend.

Nothing to Say

When the weekend is dull but relaxing there isn't much to report on anything. I can say that I'm getting real excited about our move in a few weeks. Oh good it feels to actually say weeks instead of months. Work is going real good so far just a few hitches but nothing I can't handle. The fact that I love what I do is keeping me focused on my final transformation and the last effort to grab that gold ring. I already have the brass and the silver and my goals are being achieved one by one. The knowledge that I've been given is amazing. Today we have some plans of running around a little bit but not sure if we will actually follow through since it's so crappy outside. Tomorrow is a fresh new week but it can hold off for a little while longer.

What a Week

The week is coming to a close and the weekend couldn't have come fast enough. It's hiring season again now that slowtember is done and gone. With all the recent developments in ER (HR) I will be busy for the next couple of weeks lighting fires under people to get their departments filled once more.But for this weekend I'm doing nothing but relaxing with the bear. No work talk, no mentioning of anything. We are going over to our new place to speak with the office to see how soon we can move in since this is our last month here. Packing and getting things ready for the move has been easy and since we aren't going far, the hardest thing is moving everything up three flights of stairs. I think it will be okay.

Hourly vs Salary

Us hourly peeps have our advantages when it comes to getting paid. For one, we are still eligible for overtime. For two, we are not always on the clock. On the flip side of things, salary people don't have to worry about their hours. Keeping a hawk eye on how close we are on overtime or rather getting our full 80 hours is annoying. To know that you have a set 80 hrs as a salaried employee is nice and to know that when your work is done you are done. Although the overtime is nice, I'd rather get a couple dollar raise in pay and just get put on salary to where I don't have to worry about the whole "Am I going over or am I getting shorted on hours" thing. Oh and February couldn't get here fast enough for me, I would love for my vaca to be refilled. To be getting 120 hours of vacation sounds nice right about now.

Are You Serious

Yesterday was just another normal day in the land of HR (ER) busy busy busy. The fallout from Monday was soon to catch up however. As I was driving to Walmart after work to pick up a new leash for one of our dogs I missed a call from my sister. When I listened to the message it said controversy. I was very intrigued because Sunday I had told her about our mom moving to this side of the mountains but to my dismay it was to do with my work place. I wasn't too shocked that the incident had made the news but so damn quickly. So when I came home sure enough I got there just in time for them to report it on the news that the bear was watching. This is what happens when the media has access to the police reports and they decide to dig into something that may or may not be a story. The last time we had this kind of press was with that one guy calling people. Oh well, shit happens right.

Joss Whedon

This dude knows how to entertain me. After watching the original Buffy the Vampire Slayer starring Kristy Swanson, I never had any interest in the tv series. Thinking to myself, this is going to be stupid. Well I was introduced to the tv series through a friend who was watching it at his house. I was really into it not knowing what it was and when he told me I was floored. Since then I was hooked on Joss and did some research and found some interesting tidbits about the writer/creator. Not only did he actually write the original Buffy movie, he's been around since 1989 writing for Roseanne. The reasoning behind this was first watching the Avengers and how pleased I was with how it turned out. But last night we watched Cabin in the Woods, and holy crap. It was so Joss Whedon from beginning to end. Oh and the fact that the jock was Thor, and the slut was a Power Ranger makes it even crazier. So they need to do another Degrees of Separation with Joss this time instead of Kevin Bacon, because it seems that he has his hands in the talent pool.

Sick!!

So they say that men are the biggest babies when they are sick, and this is so true. So when you're a gay couple it's twice as worse. Two grown babies getting sick at the same time sux, but luckily the bear hasn't gotten sick (yet). Thanks to the type of work I do, I'm the main target for illnesses. And wouldn't you know it, I got a cold. It has been trying to get me for over a week now and Friday was it's day to shine. It has invaded my body and now is loving the fact that it's kicking my ass right now. Thank god for cold meds and sleep. I left work yesterday at noon came home and slept for 5 hours. On a good note, I finally watched the Avengers and I was pleasantly thrilled. It was such a great movie and they nailed all the characters on the head with the people they chose to play them. I'm excited to see what is next.

Friday, Payday, and It's Gone

The bills are paid and I am stoked on our money situation right now. I'm so proud to say that we are doing pretty damn well for now. If we continue, we'll just be sitting pretty in our new place with no fear of the gambling bug due to limited funds (at least that is what I'm telling the bear). After doing a few month budget it appears that we have more money then originally thought. Which means by the time tax return comes we may be able to head down to Disneyland. But hush hush, since I don't know this for sure. Friday is finally here and this week has done a number on me. For some odd reason I haven't felt like myself due to unknown reasons, and due to medical reasons I have to do the weight loss thing again. To me it's cake because I have the restraint to do what needs to be done. As far as my annoyance levels they have been taking a toll on me. It seems that every little thing is bugging the fuck out of me and I just can't shut it off. So today to make it easy on myself, I'm staying in my office listening to some music and finding my peace. I need to get back to rebuilding the wall that has been chipped down. The worst part is I know what started it and confronting said person would just be futile. So fuck it, I'm just going to take care of it and be my old self. Have a great weekend and stuff!!

Negative Nancy

No one knows how someone's attitude really affects those around them more than I do. I was once a very negative and miserable person and tried my best to keep it bottled inside. When it started to get too much and my body language started to paint a different picture, that's when I realized that my bad mood was starting to come out. You can honestly only hold it in for so long before you start making those around you as miserable as you are. I'm not usually the one who would let my opinion persuade anyone to think the way I do. It's not fair to that person and from personal experience it's nice to let people figure shit out for themselves. I don't need to be that voice to say, "Hey, stay away from so and so because they are a fucking bitch," nor am I the person who really listens to others opinions. I am a big boy and can make my own decisions on who I associate with, but I'm not stupid and I know my audience. I learned that lesson years ago. So the same goes with others opinions about our work place or any other things that people may disagree with me on, like wrestling, Disneyland. I mention my work place because for one I love what I do and I love where I work, but for awhile I had my hatred but not for the place I work or what I did but for the people I worked with. Last night after orientation, I heard people bad mouth my work place. That is their opinion and something happened to them to where they feel the way that they do. I felt like saying  "I'm sorry you feel that way and I hope that you find something that won't make you feel so miserable". I decided not to say anything because like I said there is no changing any ones point of view once it's sunk into their brain. Instead, I told them to have a good night and finished my work and went home. In some way I feel sorry for them, but in another way I don't. I refused to give into their negativity and just let them be miserable. What else can one do?

Weight

So it has finally happened, I have to drop at least 20 pounds. I haven't felt this uncomfortable in my own skin since the last time I weighed this much. The great thing is I know what I need to do. The hard part is actually doing it. I will have the will power and I will make the change. I'm thankful for all those who told me that I'm fine, but lately I haven't felt fine. It's not about appearance, because it's not a popularity contest to me. I have to do this for health reasons and I don't want to have health issues when I reach 50. So that being said, I'm marking it down so I can look back on this and say "I stuck to my word". Oh salads how I've missed you.......NOT!!

Just Another Weekend

As time dwindles down before I must return to work, I reflect on all the football I watched this weekend, god did I feel like a man. So many college games so little time, plus seeing the Seahawks lose was the worst, but not surprising lol. Anyway, other than that we did our running around and got stuff to eat so now we won't go hungry. Today marks one month before we pack up from this shit hole and move across the street to our new apartment. I'm super excited to pay our last month here and get started. Off to work.